If I could go back in time...

I have to be held accountable even if no one reads it I have to be able to face myself and hold myself accountable. I have “fallen” off the bandwagon I have started to eat sugar, I feel terrible after I do it and yet I just cannot stop myself. What in the world is wrong with me!#*&^! I know that it is wrong but how do I stop. I feel like I have put myself in prison!!!!! There are all these things that surround me that sound so good and everything is caving in on me!!!! I have expectation of myself. Monkey had this idea that I start a stamp chart for myself every day I do not eat sugar I get a sticker if I eat sugar I lose a sticker. I think I might do this…. After thirty days I get a new outfit maybe….. in a smaller size maybe… What do you think?
I have come to realize this about myself I need to compete with me! I need to learn to support myself in my own desires. It is like I am walking towards something in my dreams and instead of reaching it I allow it to fade away and go back to being an “unattainable dream” I used to be this brat nose girl who didn’t understand what the word unattainable meant , if I wanted it I set out and did what I needed too, to achieve what I wanted. If I were able to talk to my past self I would kick my own but for letting myself get in the way. When I was younger there was no fear. I just did what I needed to do get it done. If I failed I didn’t get hurt about and distracted I tried something else.
Now I just need to follow my younger versions advice. Just get it done do not complain, and find a way. There is no longer anytime for self-pity your dream is reachable tomorrow. Stand up and be the woman you want your daughter to emulate; and do it today!

Welcome!!!!

Welcome to my new little blog here on the web. I wish I could say that I am new to the blogging world, but alas I am not. I have tried in the past to blog and I was good at it for awhile but then it lost my interest and I moved on. In fact I would start a new blog with a new interest, and the cycle would repeat itself. {It is amazing to me how many blogs you can have} I think though I have figured out how to break this cycle which is to start a new blog. I know this sounds the opposite of what I just said but hear me out. Instead of classifying this blog as a craft blog, cooking blog or crocheting blog I just assume not to assign it as any type of blog but let it take form and just be what ever I want it to be for that post. Just simple, in other words just me.

The name for the blog is truth I want this to be a source for my daughter to look at and get to know me, when she is older. I want her to know my struggles so that when she is a mother she can look back and learn from my mistakes, and triumphs. Life is a beautiful journey with bumps and turns along the way, sometimes I forget what my role is and I lose myself. In the end however when I find myself again I am always amaze with how strong I was and how much stronger I have become.

I know that most of my strength comes from my faith in a kind and good Heavenly Father. I am amazed at the beauty he gives me everyday in my blessings. I even find that trials have beauty in them if you open yourself up to it. As most have guess I am a Mormon.

Here is a little more abut me, I am in school right now to become a Registered Dietitian {RD}. I want to be an RD because 4 years ago I found out I have PCOS , and endometriosis I know this sounds like an odd choice considering but what I learned when researching PCOS and endometriosis is that food has a direct impact on why I am infertile. So the plan is to study this in detail and not only help expand my family but other as well.

I also love to craft, sew, crochet, photography, bake, cook and so on. I love to be creative so much that I even include that as part of my diet plan. {only 50lbs to go!} When ever I feel a craving that I know I do not need {such as sugar} I create first. This usually means I am making something constantly.

I am so excited to start this blog and just letting it evolve to what it needs to be at the moment I need it. I also am looking forward to making friends I think this is going to be great!